Running tries us in so many ways. I feel like a "runner" some days, yet, on other days I feel like an outsider in this sport. Last month, while in the midst of holiday planning hell and all future days seemed booked for weeks, I truly, truly came to believe that I was indeed a stranger, an importer in this world of running, "surely I did not belong" I thought. I was so convinced of my duplicitous status that I was ready to turn in the towel and go back to my life as a non-runner. Just that day I get a very gracious post on my Facebook page from a friend thanking me for inspiring her to run outdoors in winter. I was reminded by this gesture that we are not only on this earth for ourselves, but that we are also here to service others. Just as I may have inspired my friend last winter with my posts about the "hows" and "whys" of winter running, she now inspired me to play my part, not just in running, but in life.
This lessons of not giving up has helped me in so many other ways lately. Just this week, after eating holiday foods for days at a time, each run has literally felt like I was running through peanut butter with a sprinkle of pain for the first 3 miles. In addition, my pace has slowed down enough to make me, again, wonder if I should even call myself a runner. But the answer came swiftly and decisively this time. "Yes, I belong, this is my sport and all this will pass, never, ever give up". Whatever comes out of this "never give up" endeavour, it certainly will be a heck of a lot more positive than what happens if I simply chose to give up. In essence, LIFE is about never giving up.
Robin William's suicide always comes up in my thoughts in relation to the subject of giving up. I wonder if he had a clue how many people saw and felt his movies to be a lifeline, a ray of hope. Him taking his life, in essence, left a lot of people feeling hopeless. For example, his movie, "What dreams may come" helped me deal with my friend's suicide 8 years ago, and therefore William's own suicide left me feeling betrayed, even hopeless. The take away from his death is that we all look at each other for hope, we all seek through each other and the messages we send through the way we live can very much be the lifeline to other's hope and dreams.
For all these reasons, I can't give up. My pace has slowed to a crawl in the past week, my legs hurt more than usual for the first 3 miles of any run, I have gained some weight due to stress and holiday treats, but, one thing has become clear this year....giving up is not an option.
Monday, December 29, 2014
We get to the hotel and my only concern was how I would get to the race the next morning. I get this number and call it to set up a pick up. Took about 8 minutes to get there in the morning and was surprised at how easy it was to get to the start line, get my bib and my t-shirt. The race had this tubs for people to put their belongings in but we were told right off they would not really be keeping track of them much.
I walked to Dunkin Donuts and they had a holiday tree there with donuts on them.
T- minus 20 minutes....
After the race Rehoboth Beach Marathon threw a big ol' party. I had previously paid for my husband to also get the post-race lunch and kids ate free. The music was amazing and we all had a great time....oh, did I mention the FREE BEER....all you can drink?
The medal....I am finally a Marathon Maniac!! 3 marathons in 41 days.
Big boys always have a good time, as long as there is food.
Enjoying my free beer and meal....
My son, who is rarely allowed to drink soda, gets to drink soda.....very fun.
At night we go out to the town to a family dinner....Nora, orders soup with me. A rainy cold night, not like the daytime....which, lucky for us, was a very nice day.
I love rain and I love Rehoboth...so overall this evening was so nice. The next day was so, so cold, we were all thankful that the race was not on Sunday for that would have been way too cold.....hopefully next year the weather will be the same....cool, but not windy.
Next morning we go to IHOP for breakfast.
Luke of course orders a chocolate pancake, the adult size....